Eric came home for lunch today, partially due to the left over cupcakes we had from an event with Eric's previous employer (Gigi's cookie dough cupcake is amazing), and also to watch the kids for an hour so I could take a nap. He had just arrived when my phone rang. I was watching Go Diego Go with Hazel and when I saw the Baltimore number I knew it was Dr. Jallo! I plopped Hazel off my lap as quick as I could, rushed into the other room to grab the notebook that I had listed all my questions in, (I had listed them before our meeting with the neurosurgeon here, and walked out of that meeting with no answers). I rushed outside. All of the kids were inside, so outside is often the only quiet place at my house. I answered the phone excited and nervous.

He was very calm and to the point, but I didn't feel rushed. It took me a minute to gather my thoughts, and he was kind and patient on the other end of the line. He reviewed my symptoms with me, and finally gave me some information.

Tumor is likely benign and slow growing, but has reached a point that it is fairly urgent to do surgery
He said it needs to be done within the next one to two months
I asked if he thought the herniated discs were causing any of this and he thinks removing the tumor will resolve most of my symptoms, although the numbness might increase (The pain has gotten pretty bad lately, the pain meds I am currently on don't always seem to do it for me, so I would love to be rid of the pain)
The surgery lasts about 5 hours, and I would need to stay in the hospital for 5 days, then spend a few more days close by
I will need either inpatient or outpatient therapy afterwards, likely for quite a while, but can probably do that part closer to home
They will biopsy it when they remove it and we will know about a week after surgery what exactly the tumor is and if it is actually malignant.
The syrinxes will likely go away on there own after the tumor is removed and the spinal fluid can flow again.
He said that the spinal cord tissue is in there somewhere and it will just be a matter of finding it.
He told me to just email him if I thought of anymore questions, which I will probably do tomorrow as I have already thought of things I should have asked.

I am planing on calling his office tomorrow to find out how the scheduling works, and the costs involved. I hope that they can help me figure out how much my insurance will cover. It is probably going to be considered "out of network" which would leave us responsible for a huge chunk of costs, but since there is no one here who is capable of this surgery I am hoping we can get my insurance to cover it "in network". Then I think we would only be responsible for about 20%. I have looked on message boards and according to people that have been through similar things the costs can be astronomical.

God has already provided though. An old friend of the family who happens to currently reside in Baltimore has offered to let us stay with them, and some one Eric used to work with has offered to let us use some airline vouchers that would cover flights for Eric and I! It is really amazing how generous people are when someone needs help. We really appreciate all the support!

I was really thankful Eric was home at the time of the call. It was good to have someone there immediately to talk to and discuss with. I ended up laying down after the call to try and sleep. I was up very late last night because of the pain. After the call everything seemed too real. The thought of surgery set in and I had a momentary plummet into fear. I lied there in my bed and thought about leaving my kids for that long, missing them, coming home in pain, the risks of it all, my mind racing through all the negative possibilities. It's a really serious surgery, with really serious risks. As I was working myself into a tearful frenzy, Eric came in to tell me he was heading back to work. I told him I was scared and he hugged me and prayed for me. I'm feeling better. I trust God, and I will try to stand firm in faith and not fall into fear. Sometimes it is hard, it's good I have a partner for those times when I feel weak.

I'll post tomorrow after I schedule the surgery.